It is over... for good..
I never thought I am able to sustain till this day. But I am glad everything turned out well. I give Thee thanks for sustaining and strengthening me, every step of the way.
It's about time...
Time to move on lad.. You're already very much behind it to begin with.
It's a nightmare, that I can't seem to wake up from... So much affliction and damage. It's as if, I'm paralyzed, not being able to ever pick myself up again. I bear no hope, I dare not trust, nor do I know what want to believe anymore.
A life changing experience I'd say... A 180 one.. It's scary...
So, for your own sake, please wake up, and move on... Please.. I'm begging you... wake upppp...
She
She
May be the face I cant forget
The trace of pleasure or regret
May be my treasure or the price I have to pay
She
May be the song that summer sings
May be the chill that autumn brings
May be a hundred different things
Within the measure of a day
She
May be the beauty or the beast
May be the famine or the feast
May turn each day into a heaven or a hell
She may be the mirror of my dreams
The smile reflected in a stream
She may not be what she may seem
Inside her shell
She
Who always seems so happy in a crowd
Whose eyes can be so private and so proud
No ones allowed to see them when they cry
She
May be the love that cannot hope to last
May come to me from shadows of the past
That I'll remember till the day I die
She
May be the reason I survive
The why and wherefore Im alive
The one Ill care for through the rough in ready years
Me
Ill take her laughter and her tears
And make them all my souvenirs
For where she goes Ive got to be
The meaning of my life is
She
She, oh she
Will I
Will I Lose My Dignity
Will Someone Care
Will I Wake Tomorrow
From This Nightmare?
There Is No Future, There Is No Past
I Live This Moment, As My Last...
Forget regret, or life is yours to miss
No Other Road, No Other Way, No Day But Today..
Lessons
Some lessons, you have to learn it the hard way, before you fully comprehend it; for me, I guess..
So many times, have I been warn before I tread down this road. But yet, I was so blinded, and let myself to subject to such merciless abuse. Again, and again, and again. Now, I'm heavily scarred. I do not know where to pick myself up. Everyday now, is a healing process. Stitching back the wounds inflicted. Each stitch stings, as the thread goes through the flesh, and out again.
How could I've been so silly, hoping that something good will come out of it.
Deception, deceitfulness, equivocation, sophism. Is that all to it?
Perhaps there was truth.. but how do I sieve it out?
I don't know what to believe.
Another day
I cant let go, even if i wanted to.
I cant not care, even if i wanted to.
I really wish i can just not give a damn about it, and try and lead a happier life despite being where I am.
Each day is like a dread. Weekends are an illusion.
I find my rebellious self taking dominant.
I've made my choice, and am playing with my future. Standing alone, facing the oncoming slaughter of doubts.
You want so much from me, but yet not willing to give any in return. Or am I expecting too much because of what i've given you?
There is no peace nor rest. Even my dreams are haunted.
I don't know what to do...
I find no strength..
By His grace and mercy, I'm still here.. to face another day.
Haiz...
You choose to play your cards in such a safe manner.
While I foolishly and stupidly, blindfold myself and nose dive straight in.
Perhaps my judgment has been clouded, perhaps I was deluded.
Perhaps, nothing good is going to come out of this... ...
And I was all along... playing the fool...
